Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Today is the first day of my new life

I have been terrible at posting lately!  I think part of it is that I have had very little that I wanted to share about my life.  Life seems to be a constant stream of wake up, go to work, come home and go to bed.  I have been feeling really lost lately and that I wasn't in the right place and as I have pondered on my feelings I have had some wonderful insights.  I realized that I had been living my life for work, that work had become my top priority instead of the things that are eternally significant. I also re-realized that my purpose on this earth was not to live to work or give everything to make an employer happy, but it was to live for my current and future family, it was to make them and myself happy.  I don't want to wake up every single day unhappy because of what I have to do that day and I don't want my unhappiness to burden the relationships that are most important here and in the eternities.  So I have been worrying for the last few weeks on whether I should quit and I finally got up the guts to do it.  It hasn't been easy and I am still unsure what the next month will hold but I feel like today is the first day of the rest of my life, like I am set free and can now live my life without being chained to something else.  Its  a good feeling, and despite all my anxiety over quitting and my wish that I could just walk away today, at least I feel like I am going in the right direction.  I feel like a weight has been partially lifted, like I can begin my life again. Hopefully the future will bring many more positive posts about the joy I am finding in my life!